Self-Realization

It’s been a while since I wrote a blog post but I’m back! When I first started conceptualizing and laying out the story my blog would tell, I didn’t have a concrete idea – I would just write about whatever I wanted to and if people were interested, they would read and those who weren’t would skip right by. Then I started thinking that I needed to have a theme(s) for my blog and what I was writing about. I mean there are blogs about travel, lifestyle, fashion, technology and the list goes on so it would only make sense for my blog to have a so-called theme. But then I got to thinking and asked myself “Why do I need to limit myself and create a ‘themed’ blog” when I could write about anything and everything and that is exactly what I plan on doing.

I came to this realization while traveling to New York this past week which was both for business and pleasure. This was my second time to New York and I was so excited to be traveling for work and having the opportunity to extend my trip so I could do some sightseeing over the weekend. This was also the first time I would be traveling alone where I wouldn’t be meeting up a friend once I reached my destination so I was a bit nervous at the thought of being in the Big Apple all alone. But this alone time was exactly what I needed; although I was with colleagues (whom I had also never met before) and I met up with my cousin, I still had a lot of time to myself to think, reflect and focus on me.

realization-picThis made me realize that there are so many things we take for granted as we immerse ourselves into the chaos and day-to-day activities that takeover our lives. We sometimes forget the simple things like being grateful for what we have, living in the moment and taking it all in because we can be consumed with pressures to do it all and live up to this unreasonable standard and expectations that we put on ourselves. I know I am very guilty of doing this and I have these ‘quarter-life crisis’ situations all the time where I constantly question and doubt myself on my accomplishments, if I have done enough, and if I have lived up to these imaginary standards. Someone once told me that I am my own worst enemy and it’s very true – I am more critical of myself then others are and I hold myself to such a high standard that is sometimes unachievable not because I don’t have the drive and capability to do so, but because I haven’t defined what reaching those standards means and looks like. When I make a mistake, I hold it against myself for days, dwelling upon it but when someone else makes a similar mistake, I talk them through it with the ‘it happens’ pep talk and move on. So why can’t I do that with myself? That is something I am working on and with the help of my very patient and loving family, friends and boyfriend, I am learning to do so.

So you may be asking yourself, ‘What is she writing about and what is the point?” and I don’t blame you. I thought I would be writing about my amazing trip to New York and all the exciting things I did which many people before me already wrote about. For me, my trip to New York allowed me to step back from my “busy” Toronto life and reflect on so many things I neglected to do or put on the backburner because I was “too busy”. So my point is that it is so important that we all learn to step back, reflect and be truly grateful for the things we have in life that we take for granted, to treat ourselves with love no matter how disappointed we may feel and to stop putting unnecessary standards or pressures on ourselves that no one else can see. Remember, the only person you need to please is yourself; you are not responsible for pleasing everyone and that’s a lesson I too am learning.

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